Let's Play Pretend

My 5-year old self & my dad on the beach in Mexico

The tears were real, like rain streaming down my cheeks, and my sadness seemed too great for a 4-year old to bear. 'How could this happen?' I ran inside to tell my mom the devastating news. Luckily, she was in the kitchen, easy to find and working on lunch. Bewildered by my sudden appearance and emotional state she stopped making sandwiches and asked me what was wrong. I tripped over my words, unsure how to relay the perilous event that had just occurred. Between gasps of air, and watering eyes, I finally said, "Chili... got ran over... by a car!"  

It was devastating, all sorts of emotions were welled up inside me, 'how could this happen to the only imaginary friend I ever had?' ...We were so close... And yes, her name was Chili (...only I don't know how she spelled it). ;)

As children we find ways to play pretend. We find ourselves "flying to the moon" in an empty diaper box, or "climbing a castle wall" on a branch of a tree. My personal favorite was playing house in the wooded area behind our home. The dead pine needles swept together to form "walls" in the dirt; the kitchen, the bedrooms, the bathrooms... We were mini architects at work, adding doors and rooms with the stroke of a pine needle broom. Our pretend play had no limits, nothing we couldn't see or do. Some of us, perhaps the most creative... yes, let's say the most creative... even had pretend friends. 

As a foster mom I have seen different kids come through my home at different points in their lives. The youngest being 6 weeks and the oldest being 8 years old. Let's just say that creative play is a norm within these walls. What I find the most interesting is when pretend play starts to sneak into reality... Seeping through the cracks of our emotional scars as we try to fill them with words or truths that help us feel whole. 

"Will you be my pretend mom?"

Of course I will.

And suddenly the world of pretend doesn't seem that pretend after all and we have crashed together.